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.I folded my arms across my chest and stared down at the table.“It’s a decent first attempt.Better than decent.Don’t be too hard on yourself.”“It’s just all that red on my page.I worked so hard on every word.”“And it shows, but you have to allow for editorial input.After all, I have a lot more experience than you and have a few tricks of the trade to impart.Being a good writer means taking criticism and being willing to edit.Editing is key.” He stood up and reached over to pat my hand.“Your work really has potential.You are a good writer.Good beyond your years.Trust me on this one, Little Fin.”I nodded at his back as he returned to his chair.“Okay,” I said.I sat down too and picked up my cup.I held it to my face and blew on the steam.“You talked to my mother yesterday.She told me all about it.”“We had a nice drive to Toronto.It was kind of her to take me.”I smiled.Mom had gone with Gideon, not Johnny.I was crazy to doubt her.“Everything went okay then?”“Well as could be expected.She wanted to visit her sister.” Gideon sucked in his breath and looked hard at me.His face was an ashy grey.“They’re both worried about Elizabeth.”“Elizabeth?”“You told me that she came here for the summer to remove her from temptations in Toronto.”“She seems to be doing okay.I don’t think this summer will change her, though.”“Probably not, but she’ll find her way if given time and support.” His eyes studied my face.“Your mother talked quite a bit about your sister Annie.It was the first time she told me about the accident.She said that this summer has had her reliving Annie’s loss.She thought it might be because Annie would be the same age as Elizabeth.”I banged my leg against the coffee table.Tea slopped in a milky stain across the wood.“Are you okay, Darlene? I didn’t mean to upset you.”“I’m fine.”Gideon nodded slowly.“I lost my brother too.He was sixteen and at that invincible stage.Wayne was six years older than me and my hero, but his death was not even close to heroic.He was speeding and drove his car into a telephone pole.”“I’m sorry.” I was thinking how Mom had hidden her sadness from me.She’d talked to Gideon about Annie instead of to me.“It was a long time ago, but feels like yesterday sometimes.I still picture Wayne like he was then.That’s the thing about someone dying young.They never age in your memory.For a long time, I felt guilty about him dying, as if I could have stopped it from happening.You know, there are still times I have to remind myself that it wasn’t my fault.You see, deep down I know that if I hadn’t asked him for a ride home that day, he wouldn’t have been in his car.He was on his way to get me when it happened.”I looked out the window, away from Gideon’s searching eyes.“But I didn’t make my brother drive so fast around that corner.I know now that I had no control over what happened.It took me a long time to forgive myself, but Wayne wouldn’t have wanted me to carry it.He wouldn’t have wanted that at all.”I made some kind of noise in my throat then set my cup on the coffee table again.“I promised Elizabeth I’d be back soon.I shouldn’t keep her waiting.”“Okay, Little Fin.” Gideon’s voice was gentle.“Come again soon.We need to discuss how we’re going to get Johnny to talk about the war.”“Do you think he will?”“I’ll think about the best way to proceed.All people talk if you’re patient enough.Sharing what you’re feeling can be hard, but I’ve found it usually makes a person feel better if they get what’s bothering them off their chest.It can put things into perspective and give some peace of mind.”My mother was in the store, kneeling on the floor stocking shelves with cans of soup.She looked up and smiled at me.“There you are, Darlene.Perhaps you could get the box of brown beans from the back and start working in the row next to me.For some reason, baked beans are going like hotcakes this summer.”I looked her over carefully.She had dark circles under her eyes and her hair was damp with sweat.I went to get the beans then kneeled next to her on the floor.We worked silently for a bit, the only sound the cans sliding into place.Finally, she put her hands on the shelf and pushed herself to her feet.“Well, that ought to do it for now.How about a soft drink? It’s one hot day.”“Okay, Mom.”I followed her to the cooler and reached in for a Dr.Pepper.We decided to take our drinks to the front steps.Mom rubbed a cold can of root beer across her forehead and sighed.“I think the summers are getting hotter.It’s odd to actually look forward to autumn.”“Gideon told me that you took him to Toronto yesterday.”“Uh-huh.”“We’re working on a few stories together.Did you know Johnny was in the Vietnam War?”Mom lowered the can of root beer to her lap.Her voice came out too light.“I knew that.I thought you weren’t going to be hanging around those people.”“Candy left for Toronto a few days ago too, so I might not get the chance anymore.”“She strikes me as a free spirit.”“I think Johnny’s getting ready to leave too.”Mom went very still.“Did he say that to you?”“No, not exactly.” I thought of Tyler.“Too many people are leaving.I wish it could stay summer at Cedar Lake forever.It would be good if we could stop time.I’d even go back a few years.”Back before Annie died.“You have the same wish as everybody else.” Mom stood up and pulled me to my feet.“Go drag Elizabeth away from her silly book and cool off in the lake.I’ll start getting supper ready.Your father should be here late afternoon and William tomorrow.We’ll have a good weekend together, trying to stay cool in the dog days of summer.” She turned with her foot on the top step, her eyes squinting into the bright sunlight.“Promise me you won’t bring up Candy and Johnny to your father.It just upsets him.He doesn’t like outsiders, especially ones so different.”I made a cross over my heart.“Promise,” I said.It was the same promise I’d been making since Annie died.Since they’d taken Dad away to the hospital.“Maybe your mother should leave your father,” said Elizabeth, squinting through the cigarette smoke as she flicked the ash on the sand between her feet.“She and Johnny would be a better match.”We were sitting next to each other, staring out across the blue expanse of water that was as still as a sheet of paper.I shivered under my towel.We’d had a swim and the water on my skin was giving me goose bumps, even though the air was scorching.“My mother won’t leave,” I said.I wondered how much Elizabeth knew.She must have seen them together and was fishing for dirt.Elizabeth turned sideways and looked at me.She slapped me lightly on the leg.“You are so naive.” Her laugh tinkled like one of those movie stars in an old Hollywood movie.She opened a bottle of baby oil and started spreading it on her stomach in a slow circular motion.“Johnny and Candy are done.Anybody can see that.Your father is crazy and controlling.It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know where this should lead.The two good-looking sane people are going to be attracted to each other.Johnny and your mother, if I have to spell it out for you.What I can’t figure is why your sane, good-looking brother is going for his crazy castoff Candy.”“You’re the one who’s crazy,” I said
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